A moment ago, I had a whole heap of topics to write about. But now, as I sit down to write them, wouldn't you know it, they've all left me. It's annoying how that happens.
Anyway--a new direction. I am a senior in high school. As such, the responsibility of choosing what path I am to take in life is upon me. It is something that I do not take lightly. In fact, I am having more trouble deciding than I ever intended on having. For some people it is easy to choose what profession they want to pursue in college. It just comes clearly to them. But me, I have never known. I have had leadings, ideas, but never absolutes. It is such a huge decision in a person's life, I don't want to make the wrong one.
I heard a quote from some book somewhere that goes something like this, "When teenagers reach their senior year of high school, they are required to make decisions that will have a lasting impact on the rest of their lives at the exact moment in time when they are least capable of making them." That right there hits the nail on the head. It precisely sums up the trouble I am having. When you're a teenager, all you really think about is Friday night, you think about what you are going to be doing with your friends that weekend. You don't know what you want, at least not for sure. Everything is new to us, we are still learning who we are and what it is we stand for. Choosing a career is not something that know much about.
I know that this doesn't all apply to everyone. There are a lot of teenagers out there who know exactly what they want and where it is they want to go. I am not one of them. It gives me comfort to know that I am not alone in my dilemma. But it doesn't make it any easier.
Perhaps I am just complicating things. I have a tendency to do that. I've heard many girls say that that is what guys are good at. Maybe it's true. I don't know.
In my life, the only thing that I've really known for sure when it comes to a possible career choice is this--I want to help people. By that, I mean that the only jobs that have interested me are Policemen, Firemen, the military, all those other jobs that involve danger and the risk of losing your life. To save my life I couldn't tell you why. The only thought that I have on that comes from a Marine Corps recruitment card that I got in the mail--it's a calling. Not everybody has it, not everybody wants it. But there are those that deep down have a need to protect and defend. It's something in the make-up of who they are. In one of Dr. Phil's books he wrote that from the beginning of time men are the ones who protected their families, they are the ones who gathered the food. They provided. The men are the ones who went to war, they were the warriors. Not that women can't fight, but men are better at it. So for that reason, men have a need to prove to themselves and others that they are tough.
I feel I have that calling. I know that probably sounds weird. That me, a quiet kid who doesn't want to play basketball for his high school even though they all practically beg him to because he isn't an aggressive person, would have a need to protect and defend people. I can't explain it. My entire life I have been fascinated with the military. Something about it just captivates me. Seeing them marching in step, the uniforms, the weapons, the vehicles, all of it just seems so cool.
Anyway, I've got to go. Maybe I'll write more later.